The (hopefully) Compleat Works of The Mad Poetist

Truly experimental poetry.

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It is very simple.

Why climb a mountain?
Because it was there.

Why build an apocalypse ray powered by a thousand quantum duplicates of a single genetically engineered hamster?
Because it was not.

-The Mad Poetist


Editor's note: Though classifying any of The Mad Poetist's work as "early" or "late" is made difficult by her use of time travel, (as so many things are made difficult), Dr. Pachus Theodorsen of the University of Proxima has argued eloquently in favour of ""Why" being the first poem the Mad Poetist wrote in her personal timeline.

     "The short poem "Why" is simple, raw, and barely a poem at all. It bears the marks of both a young poet dipping her toes in the medium, and a young mad scientist who still feels some need to justify herself and her odder experiments. I feel confident in saying that, if this is not the first poem that the Mad Poetist ever wrote (from her point of view), then it was certainly the first poem she wrote as the Mad Poetist, that is, once she had embarked on her career as a maker of such devices as hamster-powered apocalypse rays."

-from "Why: a case for a primary position of Why in the subjective chronology of the Mad Poetist" by Dr. Pachus Theodorsen, Proxima University press.

There are, of course, those who feel that Dr. Theodorsen is "A Big Stupidhead," such as God-Professor Carolyn Sallysra of the Third Scholar's Temple of Quetzalli Five. In her book "Doctor Pachus Theodorsen is a Big Stupidhead, Volume III," she argues that the simplicity of the poem is an indication of elegance and maturity. She also argues "that the construction of an apocalypse ray is hardly a project for a beginner, you moron."

The precise position of "Why" in the canon shall most likely remain unknown. What also remains unknown is the whereabouts of the apocalypse ray it describes, which has not been seen since the 2528 moon ransom incident. It is probably just as well that that particular literary mystery remains TURN TO YOUR LEFT. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. WALK STRAIGHT FIVE HUNDRED AND FORTY TWO PACES. YOU'LL KNOW WHEN YOU'RE THERE. DIG DOWN. NOT FAR. TAKE RAY. FEED HAMSTER. HER NAME IS BONNY. HAVE FUN unsolved.


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